Learn More About
Funerals
You should always go to
other people's funerals; otherwise,
they won't come to yours.
Yogi Berra
In the city a funeral is just an
interruption of traffic; in the
country it is a form of
popular entertainment.
George Ade
If you want to see what your
friends and family think of you,
die broke, and see who comes
to your funeral
Gregory Nunn
A funeral eulogy is a belated
plea for the defense delivered
after the evidence is all in.
Irvin S Cobb
While we are mourning the loss
of our friend, others are rejoicing
to meet him behind the veil.
John Taylor
Funeral pomp is more
for the vanity of the living than
for the honor of the dead.
Francois de La Rochefoucauld
They say such nice things about
people at their funerals that it
makes me sad to realize I'm going
to miss mine by just a few days
Garrison Keillor
Where a blood relation sobs, an
intimate friend should choke up, a
distant acquaintance should sigh, a
stranger should merely fumble
sympathetically with his handkerchief.
Mark Twain
The bitterest tear shed over
graves are for words left unsaid
and deeds left undone
Harriet Beecher Stowe
Inheritance taxes are so high that
the happiest mourner at a rich man's
funeral is usually Uncle Sam.
Olin Miller
Let no one weep for me, or celebrate my
funeral with mourning; for I still live, as I pass
to and fro through the mouths of men
Quintus Ennius
The Irish are often nervous about having
the appropriate face for the occasion. They
have to be happy at weddings, which is
a strain, so they get depressed; they have
to be sad at funerals, which is easy,
so they get happy.
Peggy Noonan
The reason so many people turned
up at his funeral is that they wanted
to make sure he was dead.
Samuel Goldwyn
Why is it that we rejoice at a birth
and grieve at a funeral? It is because
we are not the person involved.
Mark Twain
A thousand people will stop smoking
today. Their funerals will be held sometime
in the next three or four days
C. E. Koop
Funerals are pretty compared to death
Tennessee Williams
A funeral is for those left behind.
Sometimes, one wonders if the
weeping is more out of fear for ourselves
than it is sympathy for the deceased.
Deng Ming-Dao
Our dead are never dead to us,
until we have forgotten them.
George Elliot
Spare me the whispering, crowded room,
the friends who come and gape and go,
the ceremonious air of gloom - all,
which makes death a hideous show
Matthew Arnold
FUNERAL, n. A pageant whereby we
attest our respect for the dead by enriching
the undertaker, and strengthen our grief
by an expenditure that deepens our
groans and doubles our tears.
Ambrose Bierce
This is the epitaph I want on my tomb:
"Here lies one of the most intelligent
animals who ever appeared on the
face of the earth
Benito Mussolini
Worldly faces never look so worldly
as at a funeral. They have the same
effect of grating incongruity as the
sound of a coarse voice breaking the
solemn silence of night.
George Elliot
When a nation's young men
are conservative, its funeral
bell is already rung
Henry Ward Beecher
